Wednesday, July 28, 2010

All About Underwear

Underwear is important.

It can make you feel secure, make you feel put-together--or the lack thereof can make you feel sexy...or skeezy. Whichever you're going for at the moment.

I've never liked the word "panties," though I'll use it in mixed company. It's always just been "underwear" for me.  In writing my novel, there are several scenes in which my MC...ahem...loses her panties. And I write it as panties. Somehow the cumbersome "underwear" just doesn't belong in a sexy scene, y'know?

Yesterday, my friend called out of the blue and asked if I wanted to go to the pool with her. I jumped at the chance, as we haven't spent much time together in the last year and have recently been working to correct that.

I hurried into the bedroom and donned my swimsuit, then decided I needed to use the facilities before leaving. Once that was done, I snuggled the kitties goodbye, then headed out.

When we got to the pool, I laid my towel on the chair, stripped off my shirt, then dropped my shorts... only to realize that, um, I forgot to put on my swimsuit bottoms.

And I'd just bared my light-pink underwear to the entire (crowded) pool.

My reaction? "Oh shit, Haley!"

Then like a drama queen, I snatched my towel off the chair and sank to the ground, which only drew further attention to me and put me in the added conundrum of how to gracefully put my shorts back on without everyone realizing I was in my grundies.

Answer: there is no graceful way to do that.

So I just stood back up and pulled up my shorts.

Honestly, if it's been a different color, I probably would have rolled with it, but light pink and slate blue obviously don't mix.

Have you thought about your MC's underwear? Boxers or briefs? Panties or thongs? And when's the last time you publicly humiliated yourself?


Hannah said...

hmmmm, I haven't tasted public humiliation in a long time.

I have thought about my MCs underwears. They're clean, white and boring!

I prefer none but any underwear I do wear usually has cartoon characters on them. I wear my Oscar the Grouch underroos when I' know, grouchy. The Man laughs every time he sees them. Sigh. I would guess I'm not so sexy then. :|

Matthew MacNish said...

Well I generally humiliate myself in public daily, if for nothing less than to annoy my kids. Besides, humility rules.

Now I don't really think about drawers when I write very often but it is kind of fun now that you mention to consider which guys would wear tighty whiteys!


Enjoyed the read, most unusual subject but why not write about underwear....we all wear it.
Well done.

Jean Michelle Miernik said...

Ha! This is an important detail to think about when writing an intimate scene. I've definitely had to do research to find out what people wore under their clothes in 10th century Europe. Plain white slips and drawers for the ladies, it seems.

Jules said...

I agree with Matthew, I do it every time I'm in public. Very interesting subject to type plain boring briefs. I just cannot grasp the thong concept, to many wedgies in school I guess. :)

Anne Gallagher said...

I'm still laughing. Fun post and who'd have thought undergarments could be so intersting.

I think the only scene I've ever written about said clothing, I've written as "bra and panties."

Valerie Geary said...

This story is amazing! Panties... I love that word. Last winter my hubby and I were taking the dog for a walk in the park and I felt something crawling up my leg towards my buttocks... I screamed and pulled down my pants yelling "get it off! get it off!" It wasn't a bug though... it was a stick. So... I bared my undies for the entire park. Yeah!

Sarah Ahiers said...

dear blogger: i hate you for not saving my comment.

truly i had something clever and witty written.
but now blogger has sucked the wit right out of me.


still, your story was hilarious

Lola Sharp said...

I call them panties, if they're women's.

I like my men commando.

Hey, being caught in panties at the pool isn't a big deal...if you'd've dropped your shorts and been commando, that might qualify is public embarrassment. ;)

Summer Ross said...

wow, that's some kind of torture you put yourself through. Its been about a year since I thought about my MC's undies, and panties do go much better with sexy scenes.
Its been a good long while since I have humiliated myself.

Old Kitty said...

Awwww!! Knickers!!! :-)

But this just so funny - I'm sorry - but it is funny and worth remembering for a future scenario maybe in your next novel!! Priceless!

Take care
p.s hugs to your sweet kitties too!

RosieC said...

I'm sorry about the situation. I have done things like that myself to be sure. Can't say I've ever pictured my characters in their underwear, but now that I am, I'm just giggling.

PS--If you have a chance, stop by my blog to pick up an award :)

jenny wilson said...

I'll never forget wheni was in high school and came out of the bathroom with my school skirt tucked into my knickers!
The shame of it!

Alex J. Cavanaugh said...

I have to admit I really don't think about underwear!
And even if they were pink, I'm surprised anyone noticed.

Unknown said...

I haven't thought about my MCs undies before, but thong comes right to mind. She'd never be caught in granny panties, that's for sure!

A few years back my sister hosted a pool party in NY. I wasn't there, but another sister told me what happened. Apparently, our sister had tipped back a couple Bahama Mamas and was lounged in a poolside chair. Sober sister sat next to her to chat, and noticed Intoxicated Sister's bikini bottom was INSIDE-OUT. (Don't ask why.) When Sober Sis pointed this out, Intox'd Sis stood up, SLIPPED THEM OFF, turned them right-side out, and pulled them pack on.

Let's just say I'm glad I missed that shin-ding. Although, apparently, most of her guests thoroughly enjoyed the spectacle.

What? Oh...I was supposed to tell a personal story of public humiliation? Sorry, fresh out of those -- how about another Intox'd Sis tale? I have lots of those! :D

The Words Crafter said...

I'm sorry for your situation, but it was totally awesome. I was afraid you were going to say you didn't have anything on, which would have been epic! I humiliate myself daily, but I work with three year olds and either they don't notice or think I'm doing it on purpose. Whew!

I referred to my MC's as 'panties'...

Anonymous said...


*cough* *wheeze*

That would've been something to see. Erm... yes. O.o

Shelley Sly said...

I don't like the word "panties". I don't know why. I always call it "underwear". Sorry about your humiliation! :(

I can't say I've thought too deeply about what kind of underwear my characters have on, though I think it would be just regular non-thong underwear for most of the girls and mostly boxers for the guys.

Anonymous said...

Hilarious, I rarely if ever promote my blog on someone else's comments, but I have to leave this link ..

Boxer Shorts vs, Tightie Whities

Stephen Tremp

Anonymous said...

Well, the link didn't work. But the post Boxers vs. Tightie Whites can be found using the search box. I feel so shameless doing this. But hey, its about underwear.

Stephen Tremp

Crystal Cook said...

Oh Summer! lol!! Seriously. I'm so sorry for your misfortune *snickers* really I am. I'm thinking about the public humiliation. . . i do that so often that it's hard to narrow it down. Not the underwear instead of swimsuit thing, but I just make a fool of myself every single day.

My condolences. Tee hee! :) You're such a bravely awesome woman that I bet it didn't phase you too bad right?

DEZMOND said...

a charmingly funny situation in which no harm was done to anyone's honour :))
I don't think I've ever publicly humiliated myself, or maybe just once. I was teaching a class with adult students (most of them older than me) and I remember how that day I'd put on my old pair of jeans trousers. The problem is that they were too tight since I gained a few pounds since the last time I wore them, so I didn't notice they were overly tight around my strategic parts as well :) and that some things down there look bigger than they really are thanks to the tight jeans. One of the students from my class, a jester, asked me PROFESSOR, DO YOU HAVE A KIT-KAT BAR IN YOUR POCKET? :))) I blushed like a tomato, but fortunately nobody heard his question except me :))

Derek Molata said...

Why do these moments always happen when I'm *not* at the pool or beach? I always hear about them afterward. Hmm, time to make my own stories I guess.

Christine Danek said...

Way too funny. I'm sure you handled it well. Sounds like you handled it better than I would. For the record, I humiliate myself everyday--especially when my son is around. **ahem**His hands tend to wander down my shirt. I swear guys learn these things at a young age. I slap his hands but really its embarassing.
My man MC boxers girl MC panties.
Miss ya and thanks for the great critique. :)

DL Hammons said...


How 'bout them Braves?? :)